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“What are you thinking?” his voice purred into her ear.  Her gaze flickered away from him to the trees with golden leaves.  The brown roots poked through the yellowing grass beneath it, piles of fire colored leaves surrounded them.

“Nothing…” she softly answered, not noticing the displeased look that instantly possessed his face.  A golden leaf fell, slowly floating to the ground unharmed.  Forget the red ones, the brown ones, the orange ones, and even the still slightly green ones; she only cared about the golden ones.

“A woman’s mind is never blank,” he retorted.  She barely kept her gaze from jerking to him, stopping instead on an open spot of the yellow-green grass.  Broken leaves decorated the otherwise blank space.  Near-by was a sturdy wooden fence lined with curious horses as a young boy giggled and pet them excitedly.

“Perhaps mine is,” she slowly replied as her gaze fell to the young boy with fiery red hair.  Her cousin; it was her duty to watch him today, unfortunately she’d run into this man, a suitor her parents adored.  A soft chuckle escaped his lips.  She didn’t know he was studying a chestnut colored horse now instead of her.

“Yours is the least likely to ever be blank, even in death,” he stated.  She shivered.  The cool breeze had no power to penetrate her decorative shawl and jacket, but his words, she wagered, could pierce even the thickest of stone walls.  It appalled her how well he knew her.  Move, she told herself, and she did so.  With casual steps, she walked over to the wooden fence and to the chestnut mare, feeling his gaze follow her every movement.  She wondered how the horses could stand being caged behind the fence, with nothing but dirt and their own toilet at their feet.  Their only shelter from the cool wind was their stalls, all of which were currently closed.  His soft steps made it known to her that he was behind her.

“My head, and therefore my mind, dear sir, shall decay into a tranquil silence in death,” she told him.  Her right hand gently caressed the forehead of the mare.  It let out a harsh breath, letting a foul smell touch her nose.  She barely refrained from showing displeasure, knowing the man behind her would find out and pounce on an opportunity.  A near-by horse whinnied, one shifted with a thump after it let its leg down.  The boy giggled again.

“A woman as beautiful as you should never decay,” he softly whispered, getting too close to her ear for her comfort.  She smelled unlike the ladies of the town, nothing like rose petals or lilacs or such scents, rather she smelled subtly of cooking and chores.  She smelled truly clean, unlike the others.

“It’s a fact of life; we shall all die one day,” she darkly remarked with a pleasant smile toward him.  He moved back slightly; the unpleasantries common women spoke of that ladies didn’t.  Her gaze shifted to her cousin. “Come on Joseph, your mother should be expecting you home soon.”
©2008-2009 ~DarkenedBounty
:icondarkenedbounty:

Author's Comments

So I honestly hate submitting text to DA. -_-

But I'm alive, amazing isn't it?! XD

So I woke up at six today and got bored and so started this little scene in my head and decided I'd write it... 'cause I've been wanting to write and hell if my Creative Writing class is allowing me to do so right now... and not like it's bettering my writing much anymore anyway... :P

And I tried to lean away from the sea and my 'gentle breezes' in this one. ^^;

Comments


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:iconsilssu:
I absolutely adore your explanatory words. There was one part I felt was a little, well, carried on.

With casual steps, she walked over to the wooden fence and to the chestnut mare, feeling his gaze follow her every movement. She wondered how the horses could stand being caged behind the fence, with nothing but dirt and their own toilet at their feet. Their only shelter from the cool wind was their stalls, all of which were currently closed. His soft steps made it known to her that he was behind her.

I think it could have been a little shortened. Though, it was good, and that's not even a real problem really.

Regardless, I loved it. :D


--
"I'm not running anywhere," I promised.
"We'll see," he said, smiling again.
:iconkitty-eared-girl:
I caught this on the main page, and I must say your writing is quite lovely. You throw in just enough details to paint the scene without making it boring.

....and I love the dialog. It gives the characters such depth effortlessly.

--
Art is the concrete artifact of faith and expectation, the realization of a world that would otherwise be little more than a veil of pointless consciousness stretched over a gulf of mystery.

If you don't believe what you see, who will believe your art?
:icondarkenedbounty:
Thanks. ^^ That spot kind of... urked me when I wrote it but I wasn't sure how to change it so just left it. >.>

--
~Simple Girl in a Complex World~

.:.Keep your chin up and your head high.:.
:icondarkenedbounty:
Thanks. ^^

--
~Simple Girl in a Complex World~

.:.Keep your chin up and your head high.:.
:iconsilssu:
Well, it's really not bad. Honestly. It's just a big..well, drug on. It seems like you just wanted to keep it going, for length..and just kept going.

If that makes sense xD


--
"I'm not running anywhere," I promised.
"We'll see," he said, smiling again.
:icondarkenedbounty:
Lol, yeah it makes sense.

--
~Simple Girl in a Complex World~

.:.Keep your chin up and your head high.:.

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February 23, 2008
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