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Our Waltz in the Night by ~DarkenedBounty:iconDarkenedBounty:



I stepped in time to your dance,
And felt that perhaps by some strange chance,
You were leading more than just my feet,
By the rhythmic pounding of my heartbeat.
So many before were caught in your snare,
And though I know I should not dare,
I waltzed right along with your sly tune,
Under a dazzling, bright and pale moon.
And I could feel the gentle brush of your clothes,
Like the way a soft breeze flows.
Your scent was but a small hint,
It wasn’t hard to tell that I didn’t,
Have the power to escape your trap,
Like Sleeping Beauty with her nap.
And then you pulled me near,
And no longer could I feel the fear.
As being yours no longer seemed,
Such a bad thing to be deemed.
But then as soon as I heard that thought,
And no matter how hard I fought,
All came to an abrupt end,
And you disappeared with nothing more to lend.
©2008-2009 ~DarkenedBounty
:icondarkenedbounty:

Author's Comments

As I said in my last poem deviation, I don't know where to put poems. -_-

Anyway, another class assignment. You were supposed to copy the style of one of your favorite poets. Well... this was inspired by two. I took the form of Edgar Allan Poe's "Alone" poem and then the idea came from reading one of my favorite fictionpress poets. XD

So here it is... I know I keep uploading homework but I don't have spare time to do things on my own... (though two uploads aren't assignments). This summer I'll be better, I swear.

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:iconelspeth87:
I really like it. The pace of the poem seems to capture the beat of the dance and your heartbeat. The only criticism I have is of the last line. I'm just not sure that it quite works. Apart from that it's lovely.
:icondarkenedbounty:
Thanks. ^^ And yeah, that last line sparked from lack of idea, need for rhyme, and to wrap up the poem.

--
~Simple Girl in a Complex World~

.:.Keep your chin up and your head high.:.

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April 29, 2008
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